Predation in the valley.

In the vast world, there is a valley which one must avoid. The moment one gets drawn into this valley, or rather, dragged hard into this abyss, the first thing he ought to so do is to get out of it immediately.

This valley is home to both the predators and preys of the world. The predators, with their resounding pride and prowess, roam around the valley like it is theirs. They know the valley's beaten paths as well as its smooth roads; they know every inch of its vastness, probably due to their lengthy, overdue stay. With one look, they can discern the preys from their fellow predators. They are the knowledgeable ones, the experts, the sagacious players.

Then there are the preys, the newcomers in the valley. They have come from places of different sorts, and, seeing the greenest pastures in this mysterious valley, wished to have a glimpse of what's inside. They eagerly found their way in, for the road is easy and very enticing. But alas! In their arrival, they begin to get lost. They wonder: Why is the inside quite different from what they expected? How did their high hopes about the valley lead to disappointments? They are prey to the predators' sharp canine.

Both the predator and prey roam around the valley, though they walk in different paces -- the predators swift and sharp, the preys careful and shaky. Soon the predators would cross paths with the preys, and thus marks the beginning of a harrowing journey these poor preys have to go through.

This valley bears witness to a vicious cycle of predation in this land. There is continous bloodshed, with the preys bleeding to death for the predators' sake. The preys are sacrificial lambs, nourishment to the predators as well as to the unmerciful soil.

This is the reality about life in this valley -- it corrupts the innocent in order to satisfy the masters. And yet, almost magically, the preys choose to remain. What is with this valley, that the preys altruistically stay, even at the expense of themselves? I wonder.

And I wonder hard about this because hard as it is to admit, I think I might be the mentioned prey.

Sun and moon.

As the sun continually chases the moon,
so do I continually chase after you.

And as the moon continually flees from the sun,
so do you continually flee from me.

On sunrise and happy mornings.

I am not a morning person. Most days, I consider getting out of bed one of the toughtest things to do.

But in the province, I had no choice but to wake up early, since everyone gets up early too. And then I thought to myself, how I wish I were a morning person. Because the sunrise is... simply amazing.

Mornings are beautiful. It's as if in the cool breeze mixed by the sun's heat, God's voice resounds.

Top: Sunrise by lola's bedroom (Agkawayan, Occidental Mindoro)
Bottom: Sunrise by the boat (Calatagan, Batangas)

From the rising of the sun to its setting,
let the name of the Lord be praised. Psalm 113:3

Transience Day 5: Bon voyage again.

Day 5. Just as I come here with mixed feelings, I leave this place with mixed feelings too.

I feel genuinely happy for the opportunity to do these things here in the province:
1. Visit Lola's grave for the first time
2. See Lolo's grave set up beside Lola's, and get touched by it
3. Enjoy my grandparents' home
4. Eat literally everything bawal -- lobsters, bagoong, pusit, fishes... seafoods that cause me allergies
5. Bond with my cousin, titos, and titas
6. Set my foot to places I've never been to
7. Feel the gush of ocean air and rub sand in between my toes
8. Look for stones (panghilod) and shells by the seashore
9. Have an unplanned, fun visita iglesia (after Easter. hahah!)
10. Reflect, enjoy, mourn, pray.

And I feel sad too, because it's time for me to go back to the real world, where there are work, stress, problems, disappointments, failures...

But of course, I know I can't be in "vacation mode" forever. And as I go back, I get to enjoy again the internet, the television, the tubig Nawasa (oh yessssssss, how I long for tubig Nawasa), the office (I frequently think about what they are doing in the office while I am away), and the company of my family and friends.

I will miss you, Agkawayan. I will miss this home. I will miss the dishes. I will miss the sea. I will miss the people. And I will miss this roof.

Bon voyage.

Transience Day 4: Dora the Explorer.

(The text is written in Mindoro. The photos are recently added for this blog.)

Day 4. I am dead tired! Today, we traveled to different neighboring towns of Agkawayan -- Looc and Lubang. In the morning, we went to a small chapel dedicated to the Black Nazarene for morning prayers. I find it amazing that the townfolks, particularly the elders, regularly pray together in the morning. People in the city would be all too busy to keep up with that kind of morning schedule. Also, they usually say a looooong series of prayers -- Rosary, Litany of the Blessed Virgin Mary, and prayers that are probably Lauds, but I'm not sure because they are said in deep Filipino. Prayer life is very much alive in this town. In my heart, I envy them for that.

We had quick breakfast and headed to Looc via sidecar. I thought the trip would be for only a few minutes. I never thought Looc is so far from here! We were in the sidecar for, in my estimate, around thirty minutes (think about it, there is no traffic in the province. So thirty minutes is really pretty far.) That distance is, by golly, unbearable if one were to journey it by foot. And yet, Mama told me that they used to walk from Agkawayan to Looc whenever it was town fiesta. Wow.

The road to Looc is pretty bumpy and dusty, but the view is breathtaking.

Looc looks pretty much like Agkawayan. Tonight, I found out that Agkawayan is actually part of Looc; the Looc that we visited this morning is just the town proper. Kaya naman pala. Hehe. After my tita bought a really huuuuuuge fish (shame I forgot to ask what kind of fish that is), we went to the nearby church, Raphael the Archangel Parish. It is a very simple church, with a simple altar and a few benches. There are banderitas outside, so I guess the feast day is near or has already passed. Even if it is such a simple church, I can sense that the churchgoers really do frequent it.

Then we went to the municipal hall of Looc. My titas wonder if the building has been developed over the years. They were not wrong; the hall's structure is beautiful and attractive to tourists. The arrangement of the community never changed, though. It is still the traditional Plaza Complex.

This is the view from the hall's 2nd floor.

This, too.

In our stroll in the roads of Looc, we ran into Fr. Anthony, the priest who presided Lolo's burial rites. It was truly eventful -- he invited us to Lubang, and even offered us a ride! My mom and titas couldn't say no, because it has been a long time since they've been to Lubang. So upon going home, we had a quick lunch, bath, and preparations. In the afternoon, Fr. Anthony finally arrived to get us. I felt like I was Dora the Explorer but minus the backpack.

If Looc was far, then Lubang is double the distance. The ride was harrowing and wonderful at the same time. My nose gathered all the road dust it could possibly get (several roads are not concrete, so you could literally eat some dust). Haha! But no matter how dusty it was, I still couldn't help but stare at the surrounding. It was virgin, beautiful, and magnificent. There were trees, mountains, cliffs that are freakishly sloped, seashores, fields of all sorts of crops, cows, carabaos, birds, and people. Even if it was a challenge to keep my eyes on the road, I managed to do it, all in the name of sightseeing. Lol.

(No pictures available during the ride. I was so busy covering my nose. lol.)

Our first stop in Lubang was Stella Maris Parish. The church was built in 2003, so you cold see that the structure is still new. The altar is so majestic and glorious. It is also pretty huge, like a regular church here in Manila (all other churches we visited were small). Then we stopped by another church not far from Stella Maris, the San Isidro Labrador Parish in Tagbac. It is much simpler than the former, and with fewer benches than Stella Maris.

That choirloft made me miss singing in the Mass.

I love the stained glass windows.

Happy fiesta! 

Lastly, we stopped by Protacio Beach Resort in Lubang. Fr. Anthony knows the owners/keepers of the resort, so we were granted free pass! Although the ocean was stunningly beautiful, we couldn't stay for too long. But I did take a few magnificent photos.

I just wanna be on the beaaaaach

Thank you, Fr. Anthony! :D

I come home with a sweet smile on my lips. Mindoro is a stunner, very rich in resources! I wish it would be a major tourist spot. It deserves to be one. :)

Thank you, Lord, for the chance to see and appreciate your works!

Taste and see the goodness of the Lord. (Psalm 34:8)

Transience Day 3: Beyond the grave.

Day 3. A few hours ago was my lolo's burial. Like all other burials, it was such a sad scene. I felt like crying but I managed not to; aside from not bringing any hanky with me, I wanted to assist my mom, titos, and titas, who were the ones crying. I was also able to visit lola's grave for the first time, and that made me pretty glad and a little teary-eyed. Hers and lolo's grave were placed side-by-side, so that they could be together until the very end -- what could be sweeter than that?

Admittedly, I feel a little envious of lolo and lola -- by God's grace, they are probably together now in heaven, their love for God and each other even stronger and eternal than I could possibly fathom. I feel envious of how they found each other, while I haven't found mine yet (if he does exist). Where is this guy, and what is taking him so long? And if he does exist, do we spend eternity together? (Heck, do we even spend our lives together?)

I do hope and pray that lolo and lola are both sharing God's glory in eternity right now.  If that is so, then that is a very strong reason to believe in true love -- one that transcends beyond the grave. What joy it is to be with the one you love in heaven! In that case, forever is no longer a lie; there is no deceit, no pain, no third parties; just plain and pure love. There is no other thing left to do but to love. Most of all, you spend eternity with the source of Love Himself, from whom all love's bliss springs. What could be sweeter than that?

I also hope that, if I embrace the vocation of married life, both my love and I would spend our lives together, die together, and see each other in the Happy Place, just like lolo and lola. I hope that while on earth, we sail with each other towards God, so that in the end, we would share the same fate of being with Him. What could be sweeter that that?

But first things first. I have to meet him yet. Haha!

St. Valentine, pray for us.

Transience Day 2: Resisting change.

Day 2. They say that Agkawayan (my mom's hometown) had changed a lot over the years.

But for me, it never changed.

When my mom was young, there was no electricity. My mom used gasera as a source of light, a de-uling flat iron to iron their clothes, and an abaniko fan to cool themselves and shoo the mosquitoes away. Water was taken from the deep well, so it was a very precious and scarce commodity. Everything was pretty simple, yet they never complained.

Today, electricity runs twenty-four hours in the entire barangay. The road is concrete and almost every inch of it is lighted with street lamps. The seashore is also "developed" -- it has a concrete pathway through which people would walk (I don't like it; I prefer to walk in the sand. But I do like the cottage and benches they built around the shore). Although there is hardly an internet connection, there is already one cellphone network signal, so it's not pretty bad. The only thing that never changed is the water system, but I don't think Nawasa will be able to reach an island like this.

There are lots of changes indeed. But the way I see it, this is still the Agkawayan that I visited and left ten years ago.

The townfolks are, as have always been, cheerful and kind to us. Some of them even remember who I am, although I do not remember them anymore. I find that really sweet and thoughtful. Think about it, it has been ten years and they still recognize me. At the same time, I feel so crappy for my memory gap.

While there have been a few newly-built houses and renovated ones, most houses never changed. When I look at the houses, especially at my grandparents', it was a familiar look. The church looked the same. The parish priest is even the same! He never left. (I thought dioceses have some sort of rotation of assignments, but maybe it's not the case for all.) The ocean also didn't change. What is even more surprising is that the forests are the same, hardly denuded by the people. Amazing.

The town changed, but it remained the same. This is already a different generation, but the culture and tradition of Agkawayan is pretty hard to change. And I wish it would never change. I wish to go back here two, five, ten years later, and still have this familiar feel that I am home.